this morning i got up and my friend asked me if i heard about what happened to melody, my thought was that maybe a reletive of hers died or she was caught drunk or somthing ya know… bad… but not THIS bad. i knew melody, i cant say i was great friends with her but she was one of the few chicks in my grade that wasnt a total bitch and i kindof liked talking to her. in fact in art freshman year she was the only one whod actually talk to me (wich is anoying cause i actually had a friend in that class but she just ignored me) i mean i can be kindof awkward when talking to people out of my comfort zone but she was actually easier to talk to. she was also a hell of a tennis player. i know a handful of my friends that were a lot closer to her too. and im really sad that shes gone… like i said she was one of the few nice chicks in my grade. and its hard to believe that you can have seen somone like that just a week ago and then you wake up in the morning and they’re dead. im not really sure what im trying to accomplish but… well melody your gonna be missed. alot.
yeah. so of course three days after i posted that all shit went to hell. it started with my cousin going into a coma then slowly for the next few days little thing added onto it. the next day a kid threw a spit ball at me then laughed at how halariouse it was to hit unsuspecting people you dont even know with your saliva. (this act leaves me debating on what i should do in retaliation. ive been toying with pouring lama spit into his back pack.) the kid behinds me keeps insisting on calling me emo wich i dont understand and frankly im pretty irritated on why he wont just give it a fucking rest. my great grandmother and my great uncle are also both hospitalized. i feel like A. is up to somthing but i dont know. just feels like she’d pick the worst time to add her speacial bitch powers into the mix of my downfall. but most of that doesnt really matter. cause most of that is selfish. i just dont want him to die.
and im really glad that no one reads my blog.
as i listen to my brother screaming about how horrible i am for deleting the page he was on (if he wanted it to stay up he shouldnt have left the comp) i have to say that right now im feeling oddly content with the way life is heading. of course this means that there will be a drastic drop in my life in the course of a few short days where ill wish everyone would just drop dead including myself but hey. right now. im good. my drawing styles been improving, tennis is over so i have more time to do things, i finally have enough cash to feed my coffee and comic book habits and im beggining to have girly feelings (im not going further with that dont worry) and to top it off, for once in my life i actually know who are my friends and who can go fuck off and leave me alone. so yeah… just thought id put it down before you know everything hits the fan and i have to start all over again.
What sucks is that that message wasn’t there before, so now I have to find a different dumpster. Life just doesn’t get easier.
Them’s the rules, son.
lol. i wonder how many babies they had to go through before thinking that a sign might stop people.
im super duper happy cause we had games on monday in osage and they made me play four matches wich is okay causei wanted to play but EXHAUSTING. but thats not why im happy. im happy cause i got one tye and three wins. though im mad cause we played matches against teamates today and i played the SAME chick as last time - somone i allready beat by the way- and the only reason that i came to the effin matches instead of going to talk to mandy was because i thought ” mmmh. maybe ill get a chance to get where my level is” but no. cause none of the chicks who are at my level wanted to play me. damnit. how am i supposed to get better if i cant get an actual challenge? im not trying to be a bitch its just im kinda anoyed. i was looking forward to playing molly actually. we have a similair level of experiance and i thought it would be a good match. but oh well. tomorrows another day i supose…
okay not that that rant is over id like to say that im working on some fucking amazing projects (and by that i mean amatureish and confusing) not comics or drawings though. im going to post a link when im done though i expect they wont be done for at leaste a few months till the end of summer. crossing my fingers that it turn out 8)
okay so we had solo and ensamble wich was really really fun except for the FUCKING judge from center 11. EVERYONE from my town said she was a bitch and i just so happened to have HER as my judge. now i am by NO means amazing at my instrument. i mean im the worst in my grade but im IMPROVING so much. last year for instance i got division two. i got lost three times and didnt play it as well as i could and i was a little bit lost. i STILL did good enough for second division. i knew that that was probably not the best judgement. but THIS year i knew almost everything except a few funky naturals and there was one measure where i fell behind but i caught up almost imedaitly. deffinately not worth a one but any other judge would have givven me a two. not only that but she tuned my instrument in front of a room full of people. told me i was too shy (deffinately not true) and told me that i need to play at church (im not christian) at first im like ” well okay other than the church thing i guess thats… okay… ” krissys who was in my duo was amazing. she all but completely made up for my suckyness and fixed almost all my flaws. if i had been playing alone id say a three was fair. but kristy did NOT deserve that. and then the next day i found out that she litterally took a pen and paper and WROTE her a long long long letter explaining to our teacher that her (in my oppinion completely conservative and professional) outfit was “not dressy enough” for a music contest. im proud of my teacher. she wrote her back.
